[2003.07.18 2109h]

   [music] coldplay \\ the scientist

somehow, some of coldplay's songs make me feel very nostalgic for
something that i don't think i've actually experienced.  the melody and
vocals call out to me, almost as if to lament about the passing of old
memories nearly forgotten.  however, not having a memory to recall that
seems appropriate for the song, i sometimes feel like i've missed out on a
wonderful part of life.  as a result, i try to at least live through it
vicariously through the song.

inevitably, through repeated playing of such a song, i eventually develop
a nostalgic memory for the song anyway, even though it may not have been
the type of memory i had thought i had never experienced in the first
place.  as a result, upon hearing such songs again, i feel nostalgic for
the memory i had formed, as well as the memory that i believe is still
missing from my life.

sometimes, during my fourth year at stanford, when i was still up and
working at around 0400h, i would go down to the kitchen, grab myself a
small dinner, plop down on the couch, and watch music videos for a bit.  
i suppose this was the ideal time to watch mtv, since they don't often
play music videos at any other time.  coldplay's yellow was probably in
rather heavy rotation at the time, since i remember watching the video
quite a few times.  hearing yellow now gives me a nostalgic feeling for
those times.

there was another time when a friend and i were singing songs on the radio
as we were going back to stanford one night.  being someone who rarely
ever listens to fm radio anymore, singing songs on the radio with people
is an activity i rarely ever experience.  as since yellow got some air
time during that ride, i have nostalgic feelings for that little songfest.

i wish i did more things with friends that involved music in some way.
memories associated with these events seem to stand out somehow...