Great Geigerisms 2.8

Brought to you by Sue #2

            Memorable Mandy Moments/Great Geigerisms
                           Episode 2.8
                        Leave of Absence

Austin and Shutt are in his office when Geiger comes rushing in:

JG:  Aaron!  Aaron!
AS:  What?
JG:  Aaron!  [to KA]  Hi!  [He pats her on the ass.]
     I made it!  I made it!  I made it!  I made it!  I made it!
AS:  You made what?
JG:  The Journal of Medicine, surgeon ranking.  There,
     cardiothoracic, Jeffrey Geiger.  Top cardiothoracic surgeon in
     the nation.  Number one!  [to KA]  You're not on the list. 
     Number one!  I made it!
AS:  The rankings came out already?
KA:  What?
JG:  It's not important, rankings, stupid I know.  Who cares, but
     nevertheless, that's me at the top, Geiger, Jeffrey, correct
     spelling.  Top!
AS:  What about uh... neurosurgeons?
JG:  You were twelfth.  That's fabulous, twelfth, fantastic!  [to
     KA]  You're... you're not on the list.  Three years I made it. 
     Three years at number two.  I made it to number one.
AS:  Twelfth?
KA:  I'm not... I'm not even ranked?
AS:  I was ninth last year.
JG:  Twelfth is great Aaron, nothing to sneeze at.  Ask her. 
     Twelve is a great number.  [KA looks at the list.]  Don't
     bother, the list only goes to a hundred.  I think we should celebrate!
KA:  This is unbelievable.
JG:  I know.
KA:  How can I not make the top one hundred?
JG:  Well, don't take it personal Kate, probably a feminist
     backlash, you know, they probably think someone who looks the
     way you look, couldn't possibly be a great doctor, but to me,
     I don't get it, you're not much to look at.
     I just, I just, I just made number one cardiothoracic surgeon
     in the U.S. of A.  [He gives KA a big kiss.]  This is a great,
     great country.  Phillip!  [He grabs the journal as he runs out.]
     Phillip!  I got news!  Great country America!

Walking out of their offices:

JG:  You're not happy for me.
AS:  I am happy for you.
JG:  No you're not.
     AS:  I'm very thrilled.  I just don't think we should have a
          big parade, that's all.  It would be nice to see you get
          this excited when one of your patients pulls through.
     JG:  Since you got-- I can see it--  Since you got polled, I
          have no right to be number one.  That's the placement. 
          You're trying to pop my balloon.
JG:  You've always been a passive balloon popper, Aaron.  It's not attractive.
AS:  Do you see what you're doing?  Do you see?  Laurie gets
     married last week and you're feeling this big void.
     AS:  So you're going to take all the information you can
          muster in this stupid ranking.
     JG:  This isn't about Laurie.  It's about being number twelve-
          - and I don't feel a void.
JG:  It's lonely at the top.  [KA passes by.]
AS:  Kate, I uh...
JG:  Neither of you are happy.  You know... you know how long I've
     waited for this?
AS:  Yeah!  Why?  Why?
KA:  Look, it's not that we're not happy for you, Jeff, but do you
     have to rub our noses in it?
JG:  I don't mean to do that.  I was just sharing my candid joy
     behind the closed doors of his office.  He's my best friend in
     life.  It's not like I flaunt it in the hospital.  I was with
     you alone and what's wrong with that?
AS:  You're right.  I'm sorry.  I apologize.  I mean it.  Congratulations.
JG:  Thank you.  [They shake hands.]
KA:  And I mean it too.  Congratulations.  [They shake hands.]
     [JG leaves down the hall and kicks up his heels.]

Birch is brought in on a stretcher.  Geiger is the only calm one
among the many who are attending to him:

JG:  [calmly]  What are his vitals? ... His heart's been hit.
BK:  Jeffrey, we gotta get to OR now!
KA:  He's not gonna make it that far!  Cut the damn chest!
JG:  Ten blade now.  All right, move ahead.  Get the heart room
     ready.  We gonna need two teams.  Skin stapler.

Pushing Birch down the hall:

JG:  You're on.  Kate, you'll assist.
PW:  I'm coming in too.  He's got a pulse.
JG:  Billy, check on the blood.
BK:  Done.

In the OR:

JG:  Son of a bitch!
PW:  What?
JG:  Bleeding right upper lobe.  Took one in the lung too.
BK:  He's got a hole in his right kidney.  He's Humpty Dumpty.
KA:  All right, All right, everybody let's just keep going, OK? 
     We're all doing fine. ... We're all doing great.
PW:  Stop being a damn cheerleader, Kate.
KA:  Shut up, Phillip.  I'm just trying to be positive.
JG:  Hey!  Hey!  C'mon!  We're making progress.  Kate's right. 
     We're doing good.  We're doing fine.  ...
     Specimen container.  All right, moment of truth.  Let's take
     him off bypass, see if it works.  Everybody finished, right? 
     ...  [They all look at the monitor.]
     C'mon Alan.  Up to you now buddy.  C'mon you little eel.
     Be a man.  C'mon.
PW:  C'mon Alan...  [AB's heart starts to beat.]
JG:  Let's close...  Kate.
KA:  Jeffrey.
JG:  This is why I'm ranked number one.

Geiger walks into Birch's office where a sleeping Camille is
holding Alicia.  He sits down in front of them and she walks up:

JG:  How's our godchild?  [CS smiles.  JG answers her silent
     question regarding AB.]  Still critical but stabilizing.  [to
     Alicia]  Come here.  [He takes her from CS.]  That a girl. 
     [He gives her a kiss.]  What does she know?
CS:  Only that he's sick.  Daddy's sick sweetie, but he's gonna be
     all better.
JG:  All better.  All better.

Geiger walks into Birch's room where Watters is sitting:

JG:  No family?
PW:  Yeah, just a mother in Vermont.  She has Alzheimer's and a
     sister we can't find.  He left an ethical will.
JG:  What?
PW:  Yeah.  His affairs.  I checked, you know, when I thought... he
     also left a regular will dealing with his financial assets,
     but then he left a set of values with an ethical will.  [JG
     takes it and reads it.]  Makes so much sense, doesn't it? 
     Well, you think, why should our last testament be about money
     and property?  With Alan it won't be.
JG:  [reading aloud]  Admire intelligence, but admire kindness more.
PW:  There's a zillion of 'em.  That's so Alan.
JG:  [smiles]  An ethical will.
PW:  Uh hmmm.
JG:  You hear what Diane Grad did?  He's gonna be very upset, legal
     exposure.  He won't be happy about this, Phillip.
     [AB begins to wake.]
PW:  It's all right, it's all right, Alan.  We're here.
JG:  Take it real easy buddy.  You're gonna be fine.  [to PW]  Take
     the tube out, he doesn't need it.  Hang on buddy.  OK, spit it
     out, spit it out.
PW:  Well done.
JG:  You've been through a lot of surgery.  You're gonna be fine.
AB:  Alicia?
JG:  She's with Camille.  She's eatin' ice cream.  She's doing fine.
AB:  [gestures to JG]  You... you.
JG:  You want her to be with me?  [AB nods.]
PW:  All right, just--just rest Alan.  Conserve your strength.  You
     were shot in seven different places.
AB:  Not respect.

Geiger and Shutt are bathing Alicia:

JG:  Hold her, Aaron.
AS:  I am holding her.
JG:  You're dropping her.
     JG:  [It's a problem?]  If she falls and hits her head, it's
          your department.
     AS:  You don't have to scrub her skin so...
AS:  You don't have to scrub like she's in surgery.  She's a baby,
     you don't have to wash her skin off.
JG:  All right, she's done.
AS:  She's not done.  You didn't do down there.
JG:  It's illegal for me to wash that.
AS:  What are you talking about?
JG:  Statistically speaking-- this child, like any child, could end
     up in therapy.  Suppose her shrink turns out to be one of
     those hypnotist.
AS:  Do you actually hear the words that come out of your mouth?
JG:  What if under hypnosis she conjures up some childhood bath
     where two surgeons washed her vagina.  They could take away
     our license, plus our insurance won't cover it.  This isn't
     just me talking, it's the spirit of her father inside me
     speaking to you.
AS:  You're afraid to touch her.  You are intimidated to touch her.
JG:  I am not.  I just don't want to be prosecuted for statutory scrub.
AS:  All you're doing is splashing her.  [CS walks in.]
JG:  Well, what are you doing?  [Alicia starts to cry.]
AS:  I'm holding her.  You're just splashing her.
JG:  I'm not splashing her.
CS:  What's going on?
AS:  This nut is afraid to wash her private parts.
JG:  You wash her.
AS:  I am the holder, you are the washer.
CS:  You two please.  [to Alicia]  Come here.  Come here.  It's OK. 
     Yeah.  It's OK.  [re AB]  He wants to see her.
JG:  Is that wise?  I-I-I mean, for her to see him.
CS:  Well, he's her father and he wants to see her.

As Geiger and Camille are walking to Birch's room, they are talking
to Alicia:

JG:  Daddy's hooked up to lots of machines and things and it might
     look kinda scary.  But it's really kinda fun.  It's a little
     like a ride at Disneyland.  [Camille looks at him.]  Just jump
     in any time.  Feel free.
CS:  Daddy's gonna be soooo happy to see you.
JG:  And honey, don't play with the buttons.  [to CS]  Kids like
     buttons.  [They enter AB's room.]
CS:  Hey, here's daddy.  Wanna give daddy a big kiss.
AB:  Hey, babycakes.
CS:  Why don't you give daddy a kiss, OK?  [Alicia starts to cry.]
JG:  C'mon, say hi, Alicia.
AB:  It's OK honey.  Not to worry.  Daddy's gonna be fine.  Oh.
     Jeffrey, I'm scaring her.
JG:  [Picks up Alicia and kisses her.]  C'mon sweetie, huh.
     [leaving]  I'll give you a surprise, OK?  For you...  Wait
     'til you see what I'm gonna show you.

Geiger and Watters rush in to Birch's room:

DG:  Alan, please.  Please, try to relax.  Try to relax.  Jeffrey's
     on his way...
PW:  What happened?
DG:  He was fine, suddenly he crashed.  Respiratory rate's thirty.
JG:  Alan, where does it hurt?  [Austin rushes in.]
KA:  What's goin' on?
JG:  I think he's throwing a [pease?].  He says his chest hurts.
KA:  That could be from the operation.
JG:  Well, he's clutching the other side.  We may have to go in. 
     His [pulse's?] down to seventy.
KA:  He just came out, Geiger.
JG:  I know, but if he's throwing a clot, we need to take it out. 
     We could try heparin.
KA:  He'd bleed on every suture hole.
JG:  I don't know, put on a green field.
KA:  It doesn't matter, if he's already thrown a clot.
PW:  C'mon, c'mon.  Make a decision dammit.
KA:  I don't think we can wait for an angiogram.
DG:  Do something!
PW:  Make a decision, dammit!
JG:  Get to the OR.  We're gonna do a embolectomy.

In the OR:

Dr.: Pressure still dropping.
BK:  Septic?
JG:  Shut up, Billy.  C'mon, Alan, c'mon...
     5cc syringe.  Hold it open.  There it goes...  That's it,
     close it up.
Dr.: I'm not getting a pulse.
KA:  Oh my gosh!
JG:  C'mon, Alan.  Hold him open. Hold him open.  [massages the heart]
KA:  C'mon.
JG:  C'mon, Alan, c'mon.
KA:  C'mon.
PW:  [from the observation room]  Please dear God.
JG:  [won't quit massaging]  C'mon, Alan, c'mon.  Alan you're not
     dyin'.  You're not dyin'.  C'mon, Alan.  C'mon, Alan.
KA:  Jeffrey?
JG:  Shut up!  Alan, c'mon.  You're not dyin'.
Dr.: He's gone.
JG:  Shut up!  Alan, you're not dying.  You're not dying.  C'mon,
     Alan.  [He stops massaging and the machine is shut off.]
BK:  Nurse, can we get the light please.  [BK takes JG's head
     light.]  C'mon.  [He pats JG on the back.]  C'mon.

JG looks at KA and then at all the faces in the observation room. 
He looks back at AB.  Shakily, he removes his glasses and his mask. 
JG takes one last look at the observation room before he turns
around and collapses to the floor sobbing in BK's arms.

Geiger is sitting in the park when Austin walks over:

KA:  Hey, Aaron told me you come here.  [She sits next to JG.]  We
     made the right call.
JG:  First, we don't know that... And second, this is my call. 
     It's on me.
KA:  I let you make the call, because I didn't want it on me.  We
     made the right decision.  What choice do we have but to think
     so.  We made the right call.

Camille and Alicia are playing on the floor in Geiger's office when
Geiger walks in:

JG:  Hi Alicia.
CS:  Look who's here?
JG:  What?  Are you playin' ball?  Does she uh... What does she know?
CS:  I haven't said anything.  What would she understand?  [JG
     leans on his desk, thinking.]
JG:  Um...  Camille, I uh...  [sits on the floor]  I know you're
     the godmother, but uh...  I think Alan preferred uh... that I uh...
CS:  I know.  Can you do this?
JG:  [smiles]  I remember asking that of Alan.  He says it's the
     easiest thing ever.  [to Alicia]  What are you doing?  You're
     gonna come live with me for awhile now, huh?  We'll have so
     much fun.  What?  [Alicia wants him to pick her up.]  Yeah,
     OK.  [He picks her up, sits her on his lap and kisses her.] 
     Your daddy.  [He kisses her.]  Your daddy went to visit God. 
     He's gonna still look after you, but uh... [She gives him the
     dearest look and puts her head on his shoulder.]  He went to
     visit God, honey.  [He kisses her again.]

In Watters' office:

PW:  A leave of absence!  For how long?
JG:  Three months, six months.  However long it takes.
PW:  Six months.  Jeffrey--  [AS comes in.]
     Jeffrey, how are you going to handle not practicing medicine?
JG:  I have a family now.  My daughter comes first.  It's only
     temporary.  Eventually I'll be back, but uh... first I have to
     stabilize things with Alicia.
PW:  How's the staff gonna react?
JG:  How can the staff not understand?  I-I couldn't save her
     father, Phillip.  I will damn well save her.
AS:  You're leaving?
JG:  That little girl's getting a new home, a new father.  I can't
     be a full time doctor anymore.  Down... down the road, who
     knows.  For now--
PW:  Jeffrey...  Talk to him, Aaron.  [leaving]  Leave of absence
     for six months.  [JG laughs and AS stares at him.]
JG:  What?
AS:  You'll never come back.
JG:  What are you talking about?  I'll be back.
AS:  You're lying.  I know you, Jeffrey.  Your idea of any kind
     of interim existence is unthinkable.  You're walking out that
     door forever.
JG:  I am not.  In time I'll be back.  It's just for now I have to think
     of Alicia.  I am not gonna be the center of the rest of my life.
AS:  You won't be back.  You'll shake my hand like you're going
     away for some long weekend because you can't dare admit th-- 
     Somebody you cared about died on your table and this is how
     you react.  You run.  You're running.
JG:  It is temporary.  I'll be back.
AS:  No you won't.  Think hard on this, Jeffrey.  You are not a
     stable person.  And outside of this hospital I don't even know
     that you're functional.  I sure don't know what kind of a
     parent you're going to be.
JG:  I'm sorry you feel that way.
AS:  I-I don't say it to hurt you.  How can you survive not being
     in that room?
JG:  I don't ever want to be in that room.  I don't want to pull
     off any more miracles.  I couldn't manage a miracle with Alan. 
     I don't ever want to be in that room again.
AS:  You did everything that you could in there.
JG:  It wasn't enough.  It wasn't an impossible procedure.  It was
     possible to save Alan.  I didn't do it.  He uh... he left an
     ethical will.  Not many people do that.  I'm gonna... I'm
     gonna be the parent Alan planned to be with Alicia.  I am
     going to be the father that I hoped to be with Joey.  And it
     is not going to happen in that room.

Geiger is packing in his office (during the conversation, he picks
up the pink train engine and wraps it in a diaper):

JG:  [holding Alicia]  Couple more things, sweetie, and then we're
     going.  [Austin walks in.]
KA:  So it's true, you're going.
JG:  Oh.  It's only... only temporary 'til I uh... you know...
KA:  Can I have your couch?
JG:  [smiles]  Don't try to take over, Kate.  I come back, I'll
     squish you like a bug.  [to Alicia]  C'mon kido.
KA:  [laughs]  I'll miss you.
JG:  I'm running late.
KA:  OK.  [He passes her.]
JG:  You're a hell of a woman.  I'll deny ever having said it. 
     [She smiles.]

Geiger is carrying Alicia on their way out:

JG:  [singing]  I'll love you in the mornin' or in the afternoon. 
     I'll love you when it's rainin'.  [AS comes off the elevator.]
AS:  Hey.
JG:  Hey... temporary.  [They shake hands as JG gets on the elevator.]
AS:  Temporary.
JG:  OK.  I'll call you.
AS:  Good luck... being a daddy.
JG:  OK, yep... Thank you.  [Elevator doors close.]

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