Great Geigerisms 2.12

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            Memorable Mandy Moments/Great Geigerisms
                          Episode 2.12
                     Transplanted Affections

Geiger is called in to do a transplant while Austin is fighting a
custody battle.  He arrives via helicopter:

JG:  I was visiting my sister.  This better be good.  I like my sister.
PW:  Simple transplant, out by tonight.
JG:  So simple, what's wrong with Austin?  She's clean and simple.
PW:  [Something?] personal she's rattled by.  I had to take her off.
JG:  Bet she loved that.
PW:  Actually I haven't told her yet, but I will.

Walking down the hall to the donor's room:

BK:  We're already done matching the blood.
JG:  Oh, good for you.
BK:  Candidate's starting to [phloembolite?] from the artificial heart.
JG:  I know.  [Enters the room]  Where are we?
DN:  Still alive.
BK:  OR is ready, team's on standby.  This kid can't be alive much longer.
JG:  OK, let me know.  [leaving]  Get the harvest team on standby
     too.  I told Alicia I'd be home tonight.

In the hall:

JG:  [?] radiology.  I want to do an echocardiogram.  I need to be sure.
BK:  [pointing to Henry Alden]  Here's your guy right here.
JG:  Mr. Alden?  I'm Dr. Geiger.  I'll be doing your transplant
     once the donor heart becomes available, which I hope will be very soon.
HA:  What happened to Dr. Austin?
JG:  Yeah, she'll likely be assisting, but since I have more
     experience, you got me.  If you'd like to go somewhere and
     talk, I'd be happy to--  [Austin comes walking up, breathless.]
KA:  Hey!  What's this?  What are you doing here?
JG:  Kate.
HA:  Why is he suddenly doing it?
KA:  Um... excuse us.  Can I see you in private please?

In Austin's office, she and Watters are arguing as Geiger looks on:

KA:  I never said I needed to be relieved of my procedures, Phillip.
PW:  Sometimes I decide that.
KA:  [re JG]  He was having meltdowns last year.  He goes coo-coo,
     you let him operate.  But me, oh no no no.  The double
     standard, right?
PW:  Your ex-husband is trying to take your kid away.  You're more
     worried about losing a procedure.  Maybe you should lose
     custody.  [She slaps him.]
JG:  That *was* out of line, Phillip.
PW:  Since Dr. Geiger is here, it is my decision to let him do the
     transplant.  [He leaves.  She sits at her desk, JG sits in a chair.]
JG:  Sorry.
KA:  Yeah.  First I lose a donor heart, then I get hit with this
     custody thing, and now you come back.
JG:  Tough week.  This isn't my choice.  If... if you think you can
     do the procedure, just say it. I'll convince Phillip.
     [Tommy Wilmette enters.]
TW:  Kate.  I'm sorry.  You want me to come back later?
KA:  No no no.  Jeffrey Geiger, this is my ex-husband, Tommy Wilmette. 
     [JG gets up and shakes his hand.]
JG:  Hi.  I don't like you.
TW:  You get away with saying things like that because you're
     Jeffrey Geiger, right?
JG:  Yes.
TW:  Heard a lot about you.  Could you sing me a song?  I promise
     I won't laugh behind your back like the others.
     [JG smiles at KA.]
JG:  Maybe I do like you.  [He leaves.]

In the locker room, Geiger and Shutt are looking in the mirror
discussing Geiger's beard:

JG:  I like it.
AS:  I didn't say I didn't like it.  I just said it's different.
JG:  Of course it's different.  I got hair on my chin.  You should
     try it.  You'd look good with a beard.
AS:  No, it just grows in gray for me.  Besides, people already say 
     I look like George Clooney.  Why would I want to--?
JG:  Who says that-- your mother?  You look nothing like George Clooney.
AS:  A lot of people-- before he got his hair cut.  [Kronk enters.]
BK:  Excuse me.
JG:  Does he look like George Clooney?
BK:  I don't know who that is.  Listen, we've got a problem. 
     Anthony Sylvia is not dying-- at least not quickly.  His
     parents think we're a bunch of ghouls waiting for him to die.
AS:  Well, gee.  How could they think that?
BK:  They're having him transferred out of the hospital.  We ain't
     gettin' that heart.

Geiger is talking on the phone in Austin's office:

JG:  Well, get everything ready.  I'm on my way.  Tell Kronk, he'll
     be assisting.  Yeah.  I want Camille for the harvest.
TW:  Isn't this Kate's office?
JG:  [still on the phone] I don't care if she's a floor nurse.
     [Walking out of the office]   She loaned it to me.  Don't tell
     her.  Excuse me.
TW:  Dr. Geiger.  Dr. Geiger.  A moment please.  Is it true she's
     obsessed with becoming Chief of Staff?
JG:  If you're looking for me to say something negative that you
     can utilize in your custody battle, let me happily offer this. 
     From what I've seen, she's not only a great doctor.  But also
     an exemplary role model for any child. I'm, uh, sure you've
     scored big fudge stripes taking Sara for weekend pony rides,
     cotton candy lunches.  But... Kate's been a mother to her
     every day.  Maybe you should leave it like that.
TW:  Of course you'd be right since you're never wrong.
JG:  No, I was wrong once, very briefly, for the few seconds that
     I thought I liked you.
     TW:  Such wit.  Must be joyous to hear your self talk.  I bet
          you can even out gab all those other little voices you
          hear in your dysfunctional head.  What do all those
          voices say?  Is it "Go away," "We don't like you,"
          "You're a pompous, egotistical, self-serving carcass of
          arrogance"?  If so, fear not, you're not crazy.  Those
          are real voices coming from every body who has ever met
          you.  I'd about given up on ever being able to agree with
          Kate on anything, but on you, concurrence.  She has got
          you pegged.  You think if you flap your little
          self-storm, nobody will notice that?  Well you don't say
          much quality-wise, but quantity, you are spitting
          flatulence.  [?]  Wouldn't it be nice if I could follow
          you around on a daily basis and learn through osmosis. 
          I'm sure I'm could learn so much from your ooze. 
          Although it does seem redundant.  See, I'm getting a little
          bored now.  Actually, listening to you, I'm finding you
          less interesting as we speak.  Maybe I should take out
          the stop watch like everybody else and see how long it
          takes from lift-off to melt-down. [Pushes Geiger away who
          is flicking finger in front of his lips.]
     JG:  Is this the part where I go, "He's a genius, he'll want
          me to surrender?"  Let me tell you Mr. Wilmette, Kate
          told me you were fabulous, but I'm extremely
          disappointed.  It's not that I have expectations.  I had
          none.  Until you failed as a father.  Keep talking Tommy,
          you're bound to say something profound.  By chance every man
          spits out a gem now and then.  Though I'm sure yours are
          couched in flatulence.  Why's your face getting red?  You
          feel somebody beating you in an argument?  Somebody's
          out-yapping Tommy Wilmette?  I'm shocked.  How could that
          happen with you having two sides of your mouth to talk
          out of?  I'm sitting here trying to figure out how a guy
          with a 30 million dollar bank account can still be alone
          in a material world such as ours, where wealth is
          considered some kind of measure of a person's value.  You
          must have some pretty negative characteristics to offset
          such a bank account, huh?  Man, let me see if I can
          imagine some of them....Vanity, lack of conscience,
          dishonesty, untrustworthy.  Let me know if I reel off
          something original.  Hygiene, let's not forget that, but
          that actually counts Missy [?]  Yeah!  Yap, Yap, Yap
          [flicking finger in front of Tommy Wilmette's lips,
          whereas Tommy pushes him away from him.]
JG:  I win.  I'd go two out of three, but I got surgery.
     [As he leaves he sees Grad and Hancock and pats Grad's arm as
     he walks by her; they are in amazement at what they just

In the OR, taking out the donor heart:

JG:  That's a good ticker we got.  I can't believe this woman just
     had a baby.  Doesn't she look great Camille?
CS:  Jeffrey, did I tell you how much I missed your sense of humor?
JG:  Actually no.
CS:  Funny thing.  [CS and DH smile.]
JG:  I know you and Dennis are sharing a wink at my expense...
     suction... Which doesn't bother me.  However, I can bring
     people closer together is fine. ...
     I'm ready.  Give me a towel.  [re Bob Malzone, the donor's
     husband]  Send him in now if he really wants to do this.  [BM
     enters.]  Once I remove the heart, she'll be gone.  [BM says
     his goodbyes and leaves.  The team springs into action.] 
     Let's go...
     [The heart is removed and put in a basin.  JG grabs the basin
     from CS.]  I'll take it Camille.  No offense.
     [He enters Alden's OR]   OK, Mr. Alden, we're tired of
     your bitchin'.  [He puts on new gloves.]  [to nurse]  Miss me?
     Yes doctor.

"Sweet Home Alabama" is playing in the background:

JG:  I'm not happy.  This is unacceptable.
BK:  Well I'm sorry to have to inform you of this Jeffrey, but we
     have thrown out all your little Motown CDs.  It's either this
     or the soundtrack to Pippin, which I hesitate to point out in
     fear that you might choose the latter.
     [Wouldn't it have been a scream if he had said "soundtrack to Evita"
     (or Yentl, Secret Garden, or Sunday in the Park with George)? :-)]
JG:  I'm taking this one back.  Turn that crap off.  [music is turned off]
BK:  Looks clean.
JG:  I think we're done.  That's a good lookin' heart, huh?  OK,
     moment of truth.  Let's get ready to go off bypass.  Clamp. 
     See what it does on its own.  [Looks at monitor.]  C'mon. 
     Give me a hundred more cc's.
BK:  C'mon baby, pump.
JG:  Give me a hundred cc's more.  [Heart starts to pump.]
BK:  All right!
     [For a moment, JG touches the beating heart (perhaps remembering 
     what he has been missing these past weeks).]
     OK Billy, you're on.
BK:  Music.  Loud!  [music starts to blast]
JG:  Remember to take out all the Kelly clamps before you close.
BK:  That's not funny.
JG:  I don't like this music, not a bit.  No I don't, unacceptable. 
     [Isn't this the music that was playing when Infante met him in
     the observation room during his insanity trial?]
     This is no pinch.  I'm very disappointed.

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