Great Geigerisms 1.3

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         Memorable Mandy Moments/Great Geigerisms (Episode 3)

                           Food Chains

Geiger talking to John Lanier about a donor heart going to someone

     JG:  I really thought he'd die before the organ became
          available, but the son-of-a-bitch hung in there.

Geiger and Camille seeing Marty, the baboon, for the first time.

     JG:  Hi there.
     Marty's vet/owner?: She's actually quite gentle.
     JG:  Yeah?  She looks like my bookie.
          Nice monkey.  Not much of a future.
     CS:  Jeffrey, does this have any chance of working?
     JG:  Not much.  What do I do, just let the guy die?

Geiger with reporters decending stairs discussing transplanting
baboon heart in Lanier:

     JG:  A little premature, I haven't even gotten approval from
          the Board.
     Reporter: How large is a baboon heart.
     JG:  Small, tiny.  Like a laywers.

     Reporter: How long can the heart stay viable inside a human.
          [JG offers him a piece of candy]
     JG:  Not long, the main thing to remember is the hospital has
          many exits.  I'm leading you all to one right now.
     Reporter: Give us a break.
     JG:  That's OK.  Come back and see us again.

Protesters storm the lobby and surround Geiger.  He yells back,
antagonizing the mob:

     JG:  Bunch of wackos.
          I eat meat.
          I wear fur for the vanity.
          I kill all the dolphins I catch in my tuna net.
          I don't walk in a shoe unless it's leather.
          [JG is carried off by security].

Geiger in Board Room discussing experimental procedure:

     JG:  By the way, I happen to like this monkey.  I already feel
          more for him than I did what's-his-name ... Hackett.
          [The Chief-of-staff who died in the MRI tube while with
     Board member:  Experimenting with human body parts, with
          animal parts.  There are some people who are quick to liken
          us to Nazis.  If anything, you might consider erring on this
          side of the sensitivity fence.
     JG:  Please don't ever dare compare what I'm doing in this
          hospital with Nazi experimentation.
     Board member:  I'm not doing that, I said others might.
     JG:  Well if they do to my face, don't expect me to err on the
          sensivity side of the fence.

     AT:  [coming into the room] I want that monkey. [to perform a
          bone marrow transplant for an AIDS patient].
     JG:  Forget it.  The ape is mine.
          He's not getting my monkey.
          You're not getting that ape.  I'm not giving him up, not
          even for a day.

When Marty appears to be missing, Geiger storms into Thurmond's

     JG:  Alright, hand it over.
     AT:  What?
     JG:  Don't be cute.  You got my monkey, I want him back.  I'll
          go straight to Watters.
     AT:  What are you babbling about?
     JG:  The baboon is missing.  Gone.  Vanished.  Like your wits.
          I think you got it stashed someplace.

     JG:  [Seeing a banana in Thurmond's pocket]  What's this?
     AT:  It's mine.  I get potassium lows.
     JG:  I've got a patient I'm trying to save.
     AT:  [pointing a finger at JG] You're not the only one
          [quickly takes his finger away, wary JG might take
          another bite] in this hospital with patients.

Geiger over Lanier's bed after operation:

     JG:  Hey.  How ya doing?  Still alive? [Lanier moves a
          Tomorrow we start in on the powdered eggs and watery
          [Lanier holds up his arm and Geiger takes his hand].

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