Mathematics??

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS
Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

OFFICE ARITHMETIC
Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

SHOPPING MATH
A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't
need.

GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS
A woman worries about the future until she gets a
husband. A man never worries about the future until he
gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his
wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find
such a man!!!!!

HAPPINESS
To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot
and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and
not try to understand her at all.

LONGEVITY
Married men live longer than single men, but married
men are a lot more willing to die.

MEMORY
Any married man should forget his mistakes, there's no
use in two people remembering the same thing.

APPEARANCE
Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed. Women
somehow deteriorate during the night.

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE
A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he
doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she
won't change, and she does.

DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE
A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a
man says after that is the beginning of a new
argument.

COMPREHENSION
There are 2 times when a man doesn't understand a
woman; Before marriage and after marriage.

HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING
MARRIED:
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me
in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to
them at funerals