Tips from Mike

Hi Mike,

I took the time to review the other suggestions (those silly people) for your big competition and decided to help you by providing a real solution.

As this is a fowl-eating competition I suggest the following tactic. At random times throughout the event stand up and shout at the top of your lungs "FOWL!". This will confuse and daze the other competitors and slow them down considerably. The time gained due to their confusion will more than make up for your slight loss of time.

While they are busy deciding whether you are just enthusiastic about the cuisine or in fact they have caused some eating fax pax which would cause them to lose, you can take a commanding lead. Thus, you will be able to win no problem.

This is the method I recommend,

Mike