If you could understand everything I said, you'd be me. -- Miles Davis

A life is not important except in the impact it has on other lives. -- Jackie Robinson

Reality is whatever refuses to go away when I stop believing in it. -- Philip K. Dick

If I spit, they will take my spit and frame it as great art. -- Pablo Picasso

A Sunday school is a prison in which children do penance for the evil conscience of their parents. -- H.L. Mencken

...our schools have been scientifically designed to prevent overeducation from happening. -- William Troy Harris, U.S. Commissioner of Education 1889-1906

It's not that I'm afraid to die. I just don't want to be there when it happens. -- Woody Allen

I regret to say that we of the FBI are powerless to act in cases of oral-genital intimacy, unless it has in some way obstructed interstate commerce. -- J. Edgar Hoover

It's kind of fun to do the impossible. -- Walt Disney

I think it would be a good idea. -- Mahatma Ghandi (regarding Western Civilization)

History is a set of lies agreed upon. -- Napoleon Bonaparte

We do not inherit the land, we borrow it from our children. -- Native American saying

When we lose, I eat. When we win, I eat. I also eat when we're rained out. -- Tommy Lasorda

I disapprove with what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. -- Evelyn Beatrice Hall, paraphrasing Voltaire

All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others. -- George Orwell, Animal Farm

If it's against state law, it's generally considered a breach of Etiquette. -- Judith Martin (Miss Manners)

An elephant: A mouse built to government specifications.

I am not young enough to know everything. -- Oscar Wilde

We must fall back on the old axiom that when other contingencies fail, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth. -- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

What a terrible thing to have lost one's mind. Or not to have a mind at all. How true that is. -- Dan Quayle

It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid than to open it and remove all doubt. -- Mark Twain

Suppose you were an idiot and suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself. -- Mark Twain

Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat. -- John Lehman, Secretary of the Navy 1981-1987

Washington is a city of southern efficiency and northern charm. -- John F. Kennedy

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. -- Redd Foxx

A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way. -- Mark Twain

"You, sir, are drunk."-Woman "Yes. But you, madam, are ugly, and I shall be sober in the morning." -- Winston Churchill

To make an apple pie from scratch, you must first invent the universe. -- Carl Sagan

It's a very sobering feeling to be up in space and realize that one's safety factor was determined by the lowest bidder on a government contract. -- Alan Shepherd

Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. -- Pablo Picasso

Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together. -- Carl Zwanzig

Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it. -- Donald Knuth

If builders built buildings the way that programmers write programs, the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization. -- Reede Stockton

Out the 10Base-T, through the router, down the T1, over the leased line, off the bridge, past the firewall...nothing but Net.

Human beings, who are almost unique in having the ability to learn from the experience of others, are also remarkable for their apparent disinclination to do so. -- Douglas Adams

One death is a tragedy, a million deaths is a statistic. -- Joseph Stalin

I've always wanted to be somebody, but I see now I should have been more specific. -- Lily Tomlin

esincoff _AT_ cs.stanford.edu